Kyle Taylor – gaytravel.com Blogger
“Sir,
I can confirm you on a seat travelling to London April 29th, assuming
the volcano stops erupting,” Anne from Emirates airlines told me over
the phone. That was twelve days from now. A group of five of us had been
camping out in my room at the Millennium hotel in Sharjah, UAE for
several hours now brainstorming other ways to travel to the gay and
lesbian travel destination of London. The notion of flying directly to
Europe’s busiest airport in the face of such obstacles as an Icelandic
volcano spewing ashing across most of the Continent seemed grim. “I
know! We could take the Orient Express! Or maybe go to Africa then ride
camels across the Sahara, cross the Strait of Gibraltar then travel
north through Spain and France to the shores of Calais, where we can
hitch our way across the Channel with some truck drivers.” My new
friends all began to laugh hysterically; “Yeah, like we’d ever have to
do all of that.”
It’s
now seven hours later and we’ve turned my Dubai friend’s office into a
situation room. Emirates is on speaker phone, the “hold” music offering
an incessantly irritating background to the chaos that has ensued. One
of my compatriots else is coordinating with a few others still at the
hotel. Pat, our host, is handing out apple cobbler and ice cream to keep
us going. I’m on the computer confirming flights to Tunisia then onward
to Barcelona, creating a 21st
Century version of camels across Africa and ferries to cross the Strait
of Gibraltar. The fastest way to travel to London is via Africa.
“Yes,
you’ll be refunded Dubai to London,” we’re told. Knowing that, we book
Dubai to Tunisia over the phone, simultaneously click “buy now” on the
connecting Tunisia to Barcelona flights and we’re at least on the
Continent. Praise to technology. After two days of watching the hot
Arabian sun rise and set over the artificial expanses of Sharjah with
zero information as to what was happening on the outside, we’re all
desperate just to feel like we’re moving. I’m tired of eating hummus for
breakfast, lunch, and dinner. There is a public stoning of a woman
tomorrow that has been suggested as a tourist activity. It is time to
go.
Travel
to Europe booked, we get in taxis and head back to the hotel. The next
challenge is getting from Barcelona to Madrid and from Madrid to London.
The new challenge is booking a train from Barcelona to Madrid then a
bus from Madrid to London. The Spanish websites don’t want to let us
book a train to Madrid and they are totally against us travelling by bus
from Madrid to London. Damn you, technology. A quick glance at the
clock alerts us that it’s 3am. We have to be up and out the door by 6am
to make our flight to Tunisia. What should take five minutes has now
dragged on for three hours. It has been us against the mighty Emirati
firewall, but nothing will keep us from London.
I
bring in reinforcements, Skyping a friend in London who then g-chats
with a friend in Barcelona who then wakes up her Spanish boyfriend who
then calls the bus company in an attempt to make a booking. He relays
info to his girlfriend, she sends it to London, and London gets it to us
over Skype. It is inefficient and annoying, but for once I have to
thank globalization and social networking. Unfortunately, even the
combined forces we’ve mustered can’t confirm any travel in Spain. We
will have to figure out once we’re on the ground in Europe.
Now
it’s 5am. Time to take a shower and pack for the airport. No matter
what, we’re on a plane to Africa by lunchtime. One step closer to gay and lesbian travel destination London.